We are relieved to announce that our eschatology poll has come to an end. Since the poll has ended, an overwhelming majority of you have spoken. 54% of you voted in favor of amillenialism. And now that we have a consensus, we at Bring the Books are able to officially announce that this is the place to come whenever you feel that you are not welcome in your premillenial, dispensational, and yes, even in your postmillenial churches. That's right, because we listen to the crowds and have little or no mind for ourselves, we are officially christening this blog Amillenial World. This will, of course, be used as a nickname or unofficial title, since Josh and I still really like Bring the Books.
And, because popular vote decides truth (polls don't lie, after all), we are also pleased to announce that amillenialism is the official biblical position. It's been debated for thousands of years, and there's been alot of tough studying done by everyone involved, but you all knew there had to come a day when some resolution would finally be reached. That's right: this poll has settled it.
And in keeping with thousands of years of Church tradition, we have the difficult task of announcing that everyone who voted amill will be allowed to stay in their respective churches, while those who voted otherwise have until the end of the month to get their theology straight or vacate their posts.
It's a difficult time for everyone, and though this announcement is easier to make because we are, ourselves, amillenial, we know this will be best for everyone.
Again, you have until January 2nd 2008 to convert to the majority position of amillenialism. After that date, if you have yet to shift your eschatology, Adam will start posting Monty Python quotes, and Josh will be forced to upload videos of himself performing Social Distortion songs, acapella.
Again, we're sorry it has come to this point, but we feel the church is better served if we just pull off the band-aid quickly rather than drawing it out slowly and painfully. In ten years, you'll all look back at this moment and realize this really was the right way to go about it.