Everyone Catechizes.

My wife and I inherited a bunch of children's books from some friends a while back. In the midst of the stack was one book called Everyone Poops. The book was intended to show little kids that it isn't weird or scary to go potty. Very cute book. Also full of defecation. It isn't reading for the weak of heart or the full of stomach, but your kids will probably laugh all the way through it.

Last night I had to do a late run to Wal-Mart. As I was entering the store a woman and her two daughters were leaving. I heard them singing something together, and my heart leapt as I considered that maybe, just maybe, this woman was singing a catechism song with her daughters (I have quite an imagination!). I was, of course, disappointed, as I drew nearer to discover that this woman was not impressing on her daughters the importance of knowing the Lord, or reciting Scripture. Instead, they were singing a song by Katy Perry:

Cuz I am a champion / And you're gonna hear me roar!

I know what you're thinking: "defecation," the music of Katy Perry... this is the part where Adam is going to tie it all together. You already see the connection. Well, hang in there a bit longer.

This woman and her daughters were singing an anthem of grrrll power. An ode to personal independence. A sugary, fist-pumping trip down pop music lane. As I walked past them, I chided myself for the initial flight of fancy that gave birth to this moment of disappointment. Cynicism is an infallible defense against disappointment, and I let myself slip. I've already decided not to make the same mistake twice. But what struck me, almost immediately, was the realization that Everyone Catechizes. This woman really was catechizing her daughters.

"You shall teach [God's words] to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise" (Deuteronomy 11:19).

I don't mean to judge this woman. I waste my time with my own children all the time, doing trivial silly things and making them experts in Star Wars lore. I am not the example I wish I was of how to educate one's children in the way of the Lord. Like most of my classmates at Seminary, I wasn't raised on formal catechisms. My point is not to say, "Be a good parent! Stop being so bad!" My point is that we need to be aware that we don't get to choose whether to catechize our kids or not.

I speak to people often who say they don't want to catechize their children with something like the Westminster Shorter Catechism because they simply didn't learn it themselves like that. Some of them say that a formal teaching method like that just isn't appealing. There are other reasons too, of course, but the point is that everyone catechizes their children. Everyone tells their children what matters most, either with their lives, or with their words, or with the songs they sing coming out of Wal-Mart. As parents, we must become more self-aware and purposeful.

The question, then, is not whether you, as a parent, will catechize your children; everyone catechizes! The question is, with what will you catechize them?

Amazing Price on Paul Tripp Series - One Week Only

Westminster Books is having a one-week sale on Paul Tripp's video series Getting to the Heart of Parenting for 75% off. I'm mentioning this video because at our church, my wife has been in an adult Sunday School class where they have been discussing parenting. They went through this exact series by Tripp, and it was truly a much needed series for her, and for us.

One of the things which Tripp does in this series is emphasize that these are not only people which we are raising, but also that every misbehavior is an opportunity to minister to this person. This small realization alone is worth the price of the videos. I have since seen my wife consistently putting this philosophy into action when dealing with our kids, and we have Tripp to thank for our new approach. We originally bought our own copy of the series for twice what WTS is selling it for, so I recommend everybody buy a copy for themselves and for friends with kids. I really can't recommend a video series more highly.

There are ten sessions, total, included in the set, based on the age of your kids. Even though you may only have little ones, you still want to watch all of the sessions so you can see the forest for the trees when it comes to the big picture of parenting:

• Session 1 & 2: What is a family?
• Session 3 & 4: Getting to the Heart of Behavior
• Session 5 & 6: Ages 0-5
• Session 7 & 8: Ages 6-12
• Session 9 & 10: Ages 13 - ?

Reforming Advertising (Or; How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love The Ads)

I have three children, and get to make tough decisions like whether the TV stays or goes. I like movies occasionally, and I have been known to watch television shows (and sometimes write about them) every now and then. I have a bit of a phobia of commercials, however. I will mute the TV or change the channel or turn it off before I will sit through a television commercial, and I absolutely refuse to let my kids watch TV shows with commercials. What I want to do here is set forth my primary reasons for my hatred of commercials and why I believe that if my kids see a lot of them, the commercials will do real harm to my childrens' souls.

Reason #1:
Television commercials in particular stir up desires which would not otherwise exist.

Example: My son doesn't want a Hot Wheels until the TV commercial reminds him that he wants one. He has enough trouble with coveting, I don't need his desires further inflamed.

Reason #2:
Television commercials, without exception, communicate one central message: Your desires are important, and must be fulfilled.

Example: Every television commercial appeals on two levels: needs and wants. These two become so intermingled that wants and needs become almost indistinguishable.

Reason #3:
Television commercials promise fulfillment which only God can ultimately bring.

Example: I am reminded of the chocolate commercials which run every afternoon during Oprah where the woman puts the chocolate in her mouth and then she magically floats away into fantasy land.

Reason #4:
Television commercials reinforce destructive patterns of self-control (or lack thereof)

Example: Commercials do not function in any way to communicate truth. Their function is to expand the market share of their particular product. Therefore, the undiscerning viewer knows only unfulfilled desire. Self-control and self-denial are part and parcel of the Christian approach to self, and yet they are both antithetical to the message of modern advertising.

To get polemical for a moment, it is not hard to believe that the majority of evangelicals finds Calvinism so revolting and Arminianism to be so pleasant. They have been told for the last 60 years (longer, really; we can't hang all of this on TV, after all) that they are important, that all things work together for those who will pay for it, that all emotional deficiencies can be corrected if we will only acquire the right thing for ourselves. Rejecting all of these premises are preconditions to being able to believe that God is the center, that we are fleeting mists, and that God is the most meaningful person in the universe, and yet they are drilled into our minds continually if we submit ourselves to the culture of advertising.

Conclusion:
If we as Reformed Christians want our children to be able to learn the catechism, memorize scripture, to enjoy reading, to be able to focus, to develop a sense of self-control, to develop a healthy sense of their own sinfulness, and to see the universe as revolving around God and not around themselves, then we should understand modern advertising to be incredibly destructive to those ends. Does that mean that seeing a commercial for a Dora the Explorer backpack will ruin your daughter for eternity? No. But it does mean that the implicit assumption in the commercial for the backpack [that she should want this item, and that this want will result in emptiness if it is not filled] is never challenged. As sinners, we and our children don't need any more help being selfish. We are enough of our own enemy as it is.